oh, come the fuck on: playbill edition.

As much as bringing social commentary-via-watered down rock with a splash of men's makeup to the stage can be annoying, the fact that Green Day is the one who made it to the randemonium ranks of Broadway crossover (like ABBA or Fela Kuti or Rock of Ages' musical ear buffet) out of alllll of the bands in the country is worse.

There are plenty of other artists who would be way better suited for a stop on 42nd Street that are instead stuck playing to crowds that stand on their feet the whole time in venues that don't have ornate ceilings for shows that your parents would never want to pay for and immediately take you out for a late-night dinner afterwards. (Clearly, the only worthwhile part of being stuck in Times Square.)

But, there's no sense in calling it broke if you can't fix it, so, we took the liberty of letting you know who we think would be better suited for a dance ensemble, song reprise and a stint on ol' Broadway:

Animal Collective. The lights? the costumes? The ability to drop acid while feeling highbrow and sitting next to a seventy-year-old theatre patron? Bring it on.

Sufjan Stevens, scoring a dramatic musical about The Oregon Trail. He'd finally crank out some of those state-based tunes he empty-promised us, and the ballad he'd write for the roadside funeral when the eldest sister dies of dysentery would be nothing short of phenomenal.

Bradford Cox playing the lead in The Phantom of the Opera...for no other reason except for that it would totally rule.

Tenacious D, only because I'm shocked that they haven't already done this.

Def Leppard. Someone, somewhere, at this very moment is stripping to one of their songs, and the idea of guys being able to tell their girlfriends they're going "to the theatre" and are instead tucking into one of those plushy seats to watch some pole action makes me want to help a brother out.

Andrew W.K., because really, he only way I'm going to understand this whole "I'm not Andrew W.K. but I am but I'm not" brain drain is with through a 90-minute musical culminating in a chorus reinterpreting the "I am he as you are he as you are me and we are all together" line of "I Am The Walrus" into a full-length Beatles-meets-Broadway tune followed by an encore of "Party Hard" where the entire audience headbangs away their meta headaches.

'N SYNC. A live-action version of that puppetering No Strings Attached cover would be a pretttttttty good pre-intermission closer. But in all seriousness, Chris Kirkpatrick probably needs to find some work.